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A fReeDom i Yearn For.
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Monday, October 30, 2006

Relax?? Nah stress !!

wad sia. Tml exam todae still play around. Haiz. Seem like long time nv touch book the book oso not good le. Not working well ehh. LoL. stupid jiu stupid. =P I not tat kind can copy the whole page/ book than tml pour out everi tin de. So Aiz. Like tat lor.

Got stress bah. Brain jus cannot stop tinking. Coz alot of rubbish inside. Think abt wad will the teacher gib? Wad can i do? Hospital posting how? How to enjoy after exam? Than tml paper how? Ai yo. Lots of tin inside. How to put the 40 plus chapter Of nursing study inside le? ehh? Haha. suan le, dun force urself too much. no point de ar. STill got sub paper =P so dun worri too much. Mus think tis way than will not stress up ^^.

Nv try sub before n actualli dun wish to hav tis chance of trying oso. No point. Of coz i'll try to pass. even wit a D i dun mind. Juz pass n god. I promise nx sem i will work hrad N study hard le ^^ *PLS*

* finialli U r well le. I'm realli happi to noe tat. U n andy is still fren tat is important. Now move on n work hard for ur life ^^ Jia you in everi tin u do. I will not force ani tin to u. even if i noe u r avoiding mi. I will help u de. I wan u to be like the old u. Happi n Free. So dun worri. i'll not go kacua u ^^ n thankz for ur blessing ^^. Gambate le*
- SuN wiLL aLwaYz ShIne AfteR RaIn. U wiLL HaVe a BeTTer LiFe ^^ i BeLiEvE u CaN DO IT ^^

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8:49 PM

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Saturday, October 28, 2006

Aiz...

Ytd was a total RUBBISH. Wad the hell. When for my veri first exam paper. N none of the question i noe how to do. suan le. Juz see which answer happi circle which answer bah. I have no confident in doing this paper. Before go in already know tat no good tin coming out le. Was late for the paper. IT start at 3. Gal, paper START at 3. Not go in at 3. waste my 10mins reading time. But gib mi oso no use. Coz already dun noe how to do le ar. Stress, pressure. aiz. Despite all the wishes i have from so mani ppl. Thankz guys. i juz hope for a pass. Dun wanna go for sub paper. realli hate it. T.T after exam feel hell dame LOW. depression set in. Headache, stomache ache. sadness, stress n pressure. Tink that i nid time alone. all is that i crave to eat bread. -.- means i m coping wit my stressor thru eatting. SIANz. So brought a bread n start munching. Nice. Ate alot can't seem to tink of a better way to make mi happi.
Homed~~ feel like throwing all the books away. arr~~ i study for 5 dae de le. suan le. at least i can tell my self. I did study. well tat make mi feel better ^^. aiz. Dun wanna said abt books le. said about sum tin elsa bah. Later going to EAT book agn. arr~~

Ppl who noe tis case will noe wad i m talking:
For ur good. I will do wadever i can. I do wan to see the sun rise agn. I dun wish to see n hear u suffering ani more. I will choose to be the bad guy. I will Help u to let go of mi. I noe my part n i will do it well tis time. I dun wanna make u sad n sad n sad ani more. I told u before given a chance to go back to the past. i would rather NOT play maple at all. To be fair to everi one. To said. Pls forget abt mi n move on. Dun try to hold back ani more feeling for mi. I dun worth ur waiting. N i dun wanna hurt u ani more. I dun worth ur tears n time. Find a better gal than mi. I know there r thousand out there. Study hard for ur future. Dun waste time on mi ani more. Think becoz of mi u loss a fren is not worth it at all. JUZ PRETEND TAT I NV ENTER UR LIFE BEFORE. LIVE IT TO THE FULLESS. n thankz for everi tin.

Currently suffering from: stomach discomfort. arr~~ MusHroOm

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10:06 AM

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Wednesday, October 25, 2006

Book worm.

i feel like one. hump. books n books n books. CMI ar.
the problem is i dun tink i can finish starting by the time i hav to sit for tat veri paper.

yes, i m still much alive as u can see. haven loss ani peice of meat in mi.
maybe even getting extra meat. call mi jia you. so fast still add oil. i sure cmi de la.

Arh. deas without free time is so boring. mus 24-7 tink of book. online onli get chase by ppl call mi go study. i got try my best de hor. but i will pass de. wahaha. Stress oso wont said so much out le.

Sorri tink i sot le. siao. juz too bored. arhz.

___________________________________________________________________

Juz reach home not long ago. 9.25 pm now. Hump. todae plan to finish one book. U tink can mah? Nah . i gib up. so tml will study extra hard todae will play extra hard. Tml will not come online. Even online oso a short while to blog or stuff like tat de. Msn will not be on. So guys n gals dun find mi. Phone off. good mah? ^^ ya... so tml MIA missing in action. I tink no one will miss mi de. so dun nid worri. Oso not the first time i go MIA la. ani way whole dae oso at home. tml plan not to hav food -.-" coz todae eat alot le wor.

Todae like out of jail like tat. Sian. when stress i'll tends to eat sia. HAiz cannot make it la. Wat the hell. Suan le. Feel veri full le. hell full sia.

hao le. dun write le ^^. i oso dunnoe wan to do wad. juz feel veri stress. Dun come gib mi pressure le. i noe i cannot finish the whole book. Juz go for sub bah. Aaaarrrrrr.

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12:30 PM

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Sunday, October 22, 2006

Hiaz...

No mood to study ar. Wanna start 1 wk before exam de, but ended up no mood to study.
than doubting heart is not a good tin. When u keep tinking abt sum tin u will nv be able to move on to do other tins. So keep on tinking n finiall i pack my thout n throw it away. wahaha -.-

u tink can mah? No lah, juz ask lor. than noe le. than believe lor. Than can study mah. But u realli mus believe than can move on. dun force urself to believe if u dun wanna believe. My case is actualli simple case. Coz i choose to believe everi words he tell mi ^^, I m juz a navie gal. Pls dun hurt mi.

But long time nv touch book le. So try my best to study. But usualli after study or may be half way i'll feel sleepy or even HUNGRY... OMG y like tat. the stomach keep calling for food. than cannot study. Haiz, worst is after food wan to sleep. Dotz -.- Tink may be best time to study is still morning bah. I realli should change back my study morning mood le. Afternoon CMI la. Haiz. specially is abt 3-4 tat time. Wow, the bed look soooo soft, the weather so fine. The fan so comfortable. turn n turn n turn. Than my eye felt heavy. than gone case lo. On the bed ZzzZzz.

Hiaz. Some more i not night bird lai de. Night is for play ^^ no matter wad oso mus play. Hahaha. Die lah, more n more playful le. Last time oso not like tat de. Hump. I noe wad u guys tinking abt. So i promise i should, start from TML wake up earli n start eatting MY BOOK. CHAPTER BY CHAPTER, PAGE BY PAGE ^^. i will jia you de ^^

* take care everi one ^^ All JIA YOU HOR ^^

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7:06 PM

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Saturday, October 21, 2006

Panda ar panda....

slept at 6plus 7 am. tis morning. Can be shen le. Coz ytd nite sum tin happen.
Tear-ed, talk-ed, trust-ed, noe-ed.

Scen:
My fren name A got a distance relationship. Than one dae, his ex told her that her boyfrenz may be 2 timing her. she did not believe her ex as she tink tat her ex maybe trying to get her back. so she decieded to find out the truth. Than to her disbelieve. It was true. she left the guy n lost her ex as a fren.

Sad case mah? hai hao bah. So talk-ed to her. Poor tin. But wad is past is past le. Hope she will be able to move on n have a better life.

Her story let mi think soo much sia. Isst all guys cannot be trusted. Talked to dar abt it. Than he call mi not to tink too much n go to rest.

Heard alot of 2 timing de story. In the end usualli 3 side oso get hurt. If given my case, i rather i m the onli one to get hurt. Is none of the other gal fault. U all should noe de. Coz is the guy 2 timing not the gal. So i still wanna protect the gal ^^V. is unfair to the gal. Than ppl will ask... wad abt urself..? Suan le, wo ren ming, there will always be sum one out there waiting for u de ^^. One dae u will find ur true love ^^ n true love worth waiting for.

So guys, i hope u all will tink before u do. Dun hurt 2 gals at the same time. Coz in the end, the most painful one will be u. Save the trouble. Juz be true to the one tat is true to u. Love tat person wit ur whole heart. Dun tell mi 2 gals gib u different nid. Follow ur heart not ur body hor. N if u r having problem wit ur current galfren talk wit her, i noe tat she oso dun wan u to go to other gals.

N gals, Pls dun act on anger, coz u sure lost the guy de. Have a peaceful talk. Than let the guy deciede. If u realli cannot tahan, than u let go urself. dun make everi one suffer. It might be the guys fault but it might oso hav been wad u hav done to make tat guy go for another gal. The other gal might not noe tat he already got u, so is veri unfair to tat gal. N lastly, Pls if u r the 3rd party, pls gib up urself hor. I hate being 3rd party !!! so noe where u stand ^^, Gib ur blessing to the couple, u will feel happiler de ^^

Pls hor... i dun hope for tis to happen in my life. Thank ar. No way m i getting tis tin hor. even thought who noes wad will happen wor. rite? haha ^^V Tired ar >.<

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12:41 AM

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Thursday, October 19, 2006

I feel great.
i feel happi ^^

happi shalala
is so nice to be happi
everi body should be happi
it's so nice to be free ^^

yeah ^^ thankz for all peer support.
thank for sissy scolding mi
thank for alan golden wordss
thank for mummy de story n guide
thank for ling telling mi wad i should do.
thank jie for telling mi no matter wad she will support mi ^^
thank to dar for all the support n not gibing up on mi.

I feel free n easy now ^^ i hav found back my soul.
haha going to be late still come in blog =P
ahhh, i'm going happily crazy. Mad le... wahaha...
suddenly feel so happi -.- sot de.

* i'll nv forgot the time we hav, it's part of the memories.
no matter happi or sad. i'll keep it in mi.
u r my past, make mi who i m todae.
u walked in my life n left footprint behind.
i'll still care for u, i will still treasure the ship we both sink n we both build.
U will always be my kor. N no one can replace u.
i'll gib my blessing n support to u ^^V jai YoU

now still look for my missing part of hardworking. hump, i nid gather my mind n start studying le. Ahh full of "u" how to study. =P i will jia you de. feel more confident lo ^^.

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9:24 AM

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Tuesday, October 17, 2006

I dun wanna be the main cast. I juz wanna be a listener. I dun wanna be part of tis. I dun wan.

Terrible.

Haiz, did not sleep much tis few daes. Partly is becoz of sum tin partly is becoz of another stuff.

Juz wanna said tired. Juz hope tat i can take off from all tis.
have i take the wrong step? have i make it worst for all the people. Is it a suffering to ani one of them. Is there a way tat all will be happi.

History is playing infront of mi, n i m juz to watch it happen agn n agn. Unble to do ani tin to change the ending.

* may be i realli should take off from all tis. I cannot stop tinking. I'm thinking too much. Too much too much

Exam in a week times n i still haven start my study. I nid support from peer. n they r realli great. Thankz ppl. exam time table:

27/10/06 (FRI) 3pm-5pm hs 3055
wah 3 books to study. How m i to study all of them, when i skip more than halves the lecture? or should i said i went for abt 10 of the lecture onli -.-

31/10/06 (TUE) 10am-12pm hs 3033
wah 2 books to study. Sure die coz half of the time, i dunnoe wad the teacher is talking abt -.-

2/11/06 (THURS) 10am-12pm hs 3032
ehh 1 veri THICK book to study -.- than full of difficult words to learn their spelling T.T suan le.

Haiz, 3 subject i already find it hard. i will gib my best shot. Iill hav to gib it a try. Hump.. Harn Ni ke yi de. ^^V

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9:04 PM

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Sunday, October 15, 2006

midnite~~~

sorri looking at my own blog to see how long i nv update le. WAH~~ more than a wk plus le wor... haha sorri ar was busy enjoying my life n doing sum stuff. Hump ~~ if wan mi recall back wad did i do. sorri guys, i forget half of it, coz i tink i juz play my daes thru. No matter if it is happi or sad. worri or relive. i juz pass my daes like flash of light.

So juz said wad i tink i nid to rmb bah. Ehh, let mi see ar.
some date to rmb:
7/10~~ jeff kor kor b'dae(wished him happi b'dae lo)
12/10~~ mi n dar veri first mth (gib him a video clip i make de ^^)
13/10~~ jie came my house n we the kukus' 4 stay a nite tgt^^
15/10~~ jie birthdae ( juz wished her happi b'dae)

Pls dun ask mi how i we celebrate our first mth coz is a long distance relationship.
so we cannot meet up n celebrate like ani one of u sweet couple out there.
like it's juz another normal dae for u all. to mi is special tat is becoz we have walk a long way.
hard way, difficult to walk. ^^ sorri, dun feel like sweet talking -.- actualli can write alot de. but todae maybe is too tired or wad le.

13-15/10 0100hrs

13/10
when to sch as usualli, but todae mus pretend tat my family got problem. coz we r going to gib janny (my jie ^^) a surprise ^^ yeah. she has been low for sum daes le. than on sundae is her actual b'dae. we should go out wit her whole dae to celebrate de. ended up, coz not all r able to make it. so we plan to gib her a surprise on fridae lor. plan for abt a wk le. Hope tat our plan will work out well. role for each n one of us. Xuan will go out n enjoy wit jan. Ling n mi will cook the food at my house. Than i m to gib her a call said i nid her over my place. coz i nid some fren support. Than surprise her wit all the food we cooked. N we r going to hav a gals nite ^^ Woo...

so carri out our plan. BUT we FAIL T.T coz she too clever n our acting too poor. Arhz. sian sia. But ani way she enjoyed the food n realli happi tat we actualli plan tis surprise for her. Jie ^^ now u noe we still care abt u n we realli still can hav "family" din din de. No matter if it is earli or late. we r all here tgt to eat ^^ haha ^^V... after that bluffed her that she should buy birthdae cake for us all. coz she said it before. n so wo pei ta go buy cake. But we already got ready the cake for her le. so bring her to walk to buy cake while the rest of them get ready the cake. Than ling called mi n said :ready. means i mus start acting.

so i acted lor. Said i m sooooo soooo sorri tat i forget tat cake shop nv open on fridae de. so ask her if she wan go toa payoa buy a not. than she said: okay, coz xuan like so look forward to hav a cake. than i told her nid go back take ez-link. i nv bring out. On my way lect her tat b'dae without a cake is not counted as b'dae. Wad's more tat it is her 21st birthdae rite. Than she told mi she wait for mi at the door step. than i got no choice than open the door. they where about to sing the birthdae song. ha... hahaha... than tis time realli suprised her.

they stay-ed at my house for a nite. Chat-ed till 3.30am than went bed. nx morning xuan said wan wake up at 5.00 am to get the first bus. But CMI so when she woke up already 6.45 am. She sit up n shout... wah so late le.. make veri one wake up -.-" So company her to take bus. Jie company mi too ^^. after tat went home, try to get sum sleep de. at abt 8.30 jan cannot sleep le. so we went down stair for breakfast leaving ling in bed. Coz she had headache the dae before ar. So better to let her sleeep more lor.

they left my house at abt 11-12 plus pm.
* jie hope u have a happi dae ^^ Happi BiRtHdAe To U ^^

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12:53 AM

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Wednesday, October 04, 2006

Realli going to do weekly post... haha... better tis way mah?
But will be hell dame long wor. haha... >.<

Saturdae~~
Went out the whole dae ^^. Morning went to eat breakfast wit family. Than went OG wit mum. She wan-ed to buy a handbag. So we looked around than decided to buy it from another OG -.-
went to another OG that is located at bencoolen stress de. Than bought wad she wanted. Was about to go back to my mum shop than did we noe it was raining HEAVILY... Hell. was realli dame heavy. Than we decided to run back lor. Finialli i get to get myself wet ^^. after reach my mum shop. Got scolding from my sis T.T she said i dunnoe how to listen de, dun even noe how to take care of my self. Sad case. Where got jie got scolding from mei de -.- than told her i got jacket lah. got plan before get wet de. So change to my jacket n dried my clothes lor. After tat we went walk walk at bugis. Took pic ^^ than headed to my god parent house for din din ^^.

Mood of the dae: Happi ^^, Loved ^^

Sundae~~

Whole dae at home n on com lor. Played maple than chat wit dar. Than mummy ask mi to o2jam wit her. But i deleted my O2jam wor. so i ask fishii to jam wit her lor. Than see them play. I feel like playing. So call dar to pei wo download O2jam. Dar said he veri noob de. =P than i tell him i m no better... haha... So we downloaded the game. Than played tgt wit my sis. Starting dar got last. than slowly, he is better than mi le wor. Than mummy join-ed us. Jamed. N most of the song i got last. Sad case, Coz i play more than dar but ended up i m more lousy ^^. It's okay, i dun mind. Coz i noe banana finger is like tat de so ^^ suan le. Enjoyed ^^

Mood of the dae: Happi ^^, bless-ed ^^

Mondae~~

Perpare for presentation tml. Whole dae nv realli chat wit dar. i m sorri. Haiz. I noe you whole dae maple. -.- not good ar. I whole dae doing my presentation tins. Went to have din din at my godparent house. meet fishii than walk to their house tgt lor. Than ask godfather to let mi use com n do my work. Was hardworking n realli doing my tins. After doing, patched maple n went in. Found dar inside mapling. He tell mi he going off lo. Good lor, play whole dae le. Than off-ed, chat-ed awhile. than he din din . After tat i go for my din din. Than went home. His msn got problem. So he went bed le. I still nid do my powerpoint. Haiz, tired. finish at abt 1 than ask fishii help mi print. than finialli lights off ^^

Mood of the dae: tired, busy, sad

Tuesdae~~

Dar gib mi morning call at 6.30am. ^^ xie xie ni. but i m unwilling to wake up. I wan to sleep back n sleep more. Cannot coz todae presentation nid meet at 7.30 in sch. So force myself to wake up. Pack lappy into bag. changed n head off to sch. Was glad finialli presentation is over. The veri last presentation wor. Can relax for tis week n i nid to plan to study for exam le. Wanted to go out wit xuan n jie de. But ended up, i nv go. coz lappy heavy n i wan to chat wit dar. so i said sorri to them n head home early. dame early lor. 1.00pm reach home le.-.- Than mapled, chatted whole afternoon. than went jogging wit fishii. ahem dun wan said all the throw face stuff out lah hor. u noe i noe can le. haha. Whole mth nv move is like tat de lah. Than dar going to play indoor football at 10.30pm. 8 plus he nid to help his father. so we ended chat. Than at 10 plus i wasnt feeling veri well so went sleep early ^^ wah so long nv sleep early lor ^^

mood of the dae: Happi ^^ not feeling well.

Wednesdae~~

Todae the story tell later bah, Going out wit fishii to eat sushi ^^ happi. Eat le than tell u all ^^ sushi ^^ yeah ^^


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10:59 AM

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That's my name.(^_^)V